Elder Advice: Thinking Inside the Box- Week 20
Week 20. They say we have to be unfailingly kind and patient with everyone during these trying times. Really? Unfailingly? And EVERYONE? To no one's surprise, my legendary patience with others is wearing thin.
I was on my weekly pilgrimage to the local bakery for the sourdough vienna - that I would be able to make myself if only I had not wasted all that time during the lockdown period of the pandemic. They only allow 2 people in - and only take 1 order - at a time, so I dutifully joined the long line behind a young woman who was waiting impatiently behind a very elderly customer. When her turn came however, notwithstanding she had been standing in full view of the shelves with every loaf and pastry that Cobbs made that day, complete with signs with every name of every one of those loaves and pastries, that young woman had not a clue what she wanted.
I listened with my customary good humour when she concluded that it would helpful to fill in the decision-making period by asking what is in every labelled scone - the blueberry scone, the apricot scone, the raspberry scone. I could go on.
My bonhomie was undiminished as she made multiple inquiries whether there might be gluten in the breads that were not marked “gluten-free.”
But I was forced to reach deep into my well of human kindness milk as she focused on the critical issue of just how thick the slices would be if she was to choose “sliced regular” instead of “sliced thick”. “Thick”, I thought, is a word with application to things other than loaves.
I only became verbally violent when she finally made a selection and proceeded to pay out of her massive change purse with what appeared to be 540 pennies. “I hope it’s not too much of a bother” she mused - to no one in particular. My response - to someone very specific - was that it most certainly was, especially for those of us who had to bear witness to the preceding display of inconsiderate incompetence. That was greeted with predictable accusations, from her, that I am “unkind” as well as a muttered “good one – thanks” from the elderly man behind me.
He no doubt went home and told his family how delighted he was to see an appallingly self-interested person dealt with appropriately. “Because”, I am sure he reported to them, “such people don’t hear ‘suggestions’ as to how their behavior ‘might’ be viewed as ‘controversial’ and perhaps could be ‘adjusted’…. if it isn’t too much of a bother.” “Such people”, he would have continued, “require unequivocal, public rebuke.”
Meanwhile, I was thinking: if we could only convince Mother Nature to be a bit more targeted in her approach, and focus on these people, there could be a silver lining to this pandemic.
All of which may be why the kids on my street tell one another: “Don’t hit the ball into old man Lowman’s backyard – you’ll never see it again.”